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I'm Gonna Hire a Boy Scout

 
Came home late Sunday afternoon
Finally got out all my gear as she opened the door
She said your not going to do this any more...

Chorus
She said I'm going to hire a Boy Scout to decorate our home
So you'll feel more at ease here, you won't need to roam
We'll take down the family pictures, hang backpacks on the wall
And we'll lash a latrine seat in our bathroom down the hall

Just bring those tin foil dinners, and I'll cook them all right here
And we'll drink Apple Bug Juice & Good ole Schwepps Root Beer
And just for you I'll keep a stock of those all Aluminum cans,
so you can go recycling for your environmental plans

Chorus

We'll rip out all the carpet and put pine needles on the floor
And we'll put up a gateway for when you come through the door
And when you want your super you can flick your bic
Instead of gourmet cooking we'll have hot dogs on a stick

Chorus

Instead of nightly teevee we'll have a campfire show
And I'll get you to sing for me those stupid songs you know
And I'll do a funny cheer for you each time you tell a joke
As long as you don't repeat old skits I'll laugh until I croak

Chorus

Instead of family planning we'll have a PLC
And maybe plan the council calendar for the year 2003
If my trading post is open, you can rob your piggy bank,
And when you make Silver Beaver, why you'll have me to thank

Chorus

So the next time you want to go camping
And you have a weekend free
Why there won't be any reason why you can't stay here with me

Chorus
Repeat last line & Bow