A Balancing Act
A Balancing Act
Gerry Mulder
The Leader, October 1992
As a Scouter with three different sections over the last 10
years, I've seen a number of successful Scouting programs and
watched the people who make them successful. The successful
programs balance spiritual needs, outdoor enthusiasm, community
responsibilities, and the youth members' goals and personal
needs. We can compare the balancing act to a child's wagon. If
the program is the wagon and the components are the wheels, then
leaders must be able to balance the wheels so that the wagon
doesn't become wobbly.
Another balancing act a Scouter must master includes the various
components of his or her personal life. Every new Scouter
quickly learns that the job takes more than an hour a week. Just
as quickly, all Scouters have to start balancing their time
to contain this new, exhilarating and all-consuming commitment.
It is very easy to fall into the trap of talking and doing
Scouting all the time. Scouters must be prepared to create a
balance between Scouting, their friends, their social life, their
spiritual commitment, their work, their hobbies, their family
life, and all the chores in the job jar.
We often tend to focus on one or two things in our lives, letting
the rest slide. When things get too hectic, we scramble to catch
up. Although this "seat of the pants" priority-setting may work
for some people, ultimately it catches up with us.
If, for example, we reduce the attention we give to our family,
we are playing with one of the most important components in the
balance. Results can include strained relationships, shortened
tempers, arguments and, if not caught in time, even family break
-ups. I sincerely doubt that our founder intended Scouting to
have that kind of impact on us. And I am certain it isn't the
spiritual message we are to live by.
Spiritual commitment is a very important part of the balancing
act as Scouters, we've always known that spirituality is
important but, for various reasons, including procrastination,
ignorance, or fear of hitting some nerves, did not include it in
our program.
It becomes very difficult to deliver the spiritual component to
our young members if we do not practise it ourselves. When we
attend religious services of our faith, participate in the
activities of our religious community, and socialize with our
faith family, we become much stronger and have much more
confidence and credibility when we include spirituality in our
program.
When was the last time you got together with friends who are not
active in Scouting? Did you spend most of your time talking
about Scouting anyway? People develop different interests
through their lives, and their friends often change as well. But
it is vital to retain friends outside of Scouting. It ensures
you will remain active in the community, keeps your mind open to
other things around you, and leaves open the door for friends to
depend on you. It also gives others an opportunity to see
Scouting through you; they may even want to join the fun!
Nothing can start an argument more quickly around a house than
the job jar. If you are always on Scout outings, who is doing
your chores at home? Is your spouse cooking the meals, mowing
the lawn, cleaning the house and garage, taking out the trash? If
so, delegate the next outing to another leader or parent so that
you can balance your home life with your Scouting interests. It
will also create an excellent opportunity for someone else to
experience the euphoria of an appreciative group of Scouts.
Put Scouting In Context
Since computers were installed at my workplace. I have taken the
opportunity to do some of my administrative work during my
lunchbreaks. I have to be careful, however, to keep Scouting in
its proper context. It's important that you don't let your
enthusiasm for Scouting get in the way of making sure your
employer gets his money's worth out of you.
In the January '92 issue, Scouter Blue' offered some excellent
ways to keep your spouse as committed to Scouting as you. But
what about you? When was the last time you read a good book,
completed a crossword puzzle, or constructed a model airplane?
When did you last play "tea time" with your daughter, help bake
some cookies, or take a walk with your spouse?
Everyone has hobbies, and you have to budget time in your busy
life to treat yourself once in awhile, too. Of course, you
need to balance this treat with the world around you. If you do
things with your family, finish your chores, and run an active
and enthusiastic Scouting program, I am sure your district
commissioner will understand when you tell him or her that you
are taking the night off to work on your Lego set!
It's easy to talk about the balancing act, but much harder to
practise it. In the book Who You Are When No One's Looking
(Intervarsity Press, Illinois, 1987), writer Bill Hybels says
that people who have their act together are those who practise
discipline. They set priorities and delay gratification. He
describes "delayed gratification" as "a process of scheduling the
pain and pleasure of life in such a way as to enhance the
pleasure by meeting and experiencing the pain first and getting
it over with".
How do you eat your cake? Do you save all the icing until last?
If so, you are practising discipline--eating the less desirable
part first and leaving the best for later. You can apply the
idea to practising balance. If we take care of our family and
household priorities first, the time we have to offer our
Scouting program can be that much more rewarding because we don't
need to feel guilty about other things we should be doing.
Scouting is a balancing act. To grow as an adult, family member,
leader, role model to young people, member of your faith, and
friend to those around you, you have to balance your time and
energy. You will not do Scouting any good if you allow the
balance to tip so far in one direction that everyone around you
suffers.
The point was really driven home when I completed my Wood Badge
II. At our closing horseshoe, our excellent leader offered this
advice. As much as we were excited about the fun, new friends,
and experiences we'd had during the week, he said, the first
thing to do when we got home was to ask our families how their
week went and what they did.
"You will have plenty of time to tell them about your experiences
later," he said. A simple suggestion to help us keep the balance
in our lives.
Gerry Mulder is Troop Scouter with the 1st Wainfleet Scouts, Ont.
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